Mood Swings

It must be that my practice, the yoga and maturity, help with your own moon swings and more importantly that of others.  It’s been a long time to spend with my son and I would say we can name the times and the instances when we had a little discord between us and really it was mostly about his mood swing.  You see, he is 17 and it is just bound to happen.  I have trusted myself and come up with activities for us to share and many times this had to be handled somewhat delicately.  Meaning without emotion, without pushing and without too much controlling tactics.

He is counting days, counting practices and I am just sad and feel like I have unfinished business with regards to my practice.  The thing with this practice is that you are never done.  Every day you come to the mat you are different no matter where you are.  Each practice here has been different.  Now I want to put them all together, all the good things, all the times I felt connected to something deep inside me and all the times I was really focused.  I have run out of time to do this here and I am sad to be leaving this place and this routine of what I have become accustomed to.   It is not easy here.  The practices around me in the early slot are awesome.     Practicing with authorized and certified teachers around the world as well as people who have been practicing here in Mysore for over a month who seem to have evolved in my eyes, all sharing the energy of the Shala and with Sharath holding that energy.    I try so hard not to be distracted and to focus on my practice.    I know that I will continue my journey back to AYM and leave Mysore behind in a few days.  I have Led Primary tomorrow and Sunday and by the time conference comes I will have to get ready for the emotional roller coaster ride of saying goodbye.   I wonder if it just is all about unfinished business and that what we are doing here is never finished, complete or perfect.  It’s a practice and I am thankful for that.   It is all a practice of letting go.  I am thankful to be able to practice and for being able to let go.